Sunday, September 23, 2007

Lesson Learned


Nature is one of the joys of my soul; it calms, it edifies, and it moves me. But when we left Cache Valley my main thoughts were of Ahenobarbus leaving the wilderness behind for the city. Without Wildman and a no clear path in front of them, where would he go when he needed to refresh his soul? Where would he go to find the peace and communion that come from solos when the nearest campground is two hours away? Here all wilderness is state or local parks, which are appreciated, but small and very often filled with people.


Then the answer came (at least in part) -- he discovered the Wildlife Bird Refuge. The six hours a week he has found to volunteer there have already taught him many new skills (like how to properly clean a dead mouse) and he looks forward to many new experiences with birds all of kinds, especially raptors. This communion with the birds has given him a small outlet and helps to keep him sane amongst his studies.


But what of me? It took moving here and then leaving the city for a quick trip to Madison over Labor Day weekend for me to learn my lesson. Leaving the city and driving through open land - granted much of it was corn fields - was cleansing in an unexpected way. It encouraged me to look deeper and discover the ways that I need nature. I do not crave it the way that Ahenobarbus does, but in a way that even I did not understand before moving to (quoting from the St. Louis news) this "asphalt island." My heart yearns for the colors of fall in Sardine canyon; the endless views from Mt. Logan; the peace of a walk along a trail without anyone else; the red warmth of Zion sand.


I am learning to like living here and I am enjoying our adventure. I love being home with Beemer and the opportunity that being here has given me to do that. I love watching Ahenobarbus ignite as he learns new concepts that stir his intelligence. Meeting new people and seeing new places are exciting and I am learning a lot about myself and my family.


But I have also learned how precious that which I took for granted was and how essential it is to me. For now, I hope to begin the process of finding it here, while I cherish the memories of what I have found in the past.

2 comments:

CowboyBob said...

Reading, or listening to, your insights is like feasting at a banquet table. It fills my soul. Thank you.

Ahenobarbus Textor said...

I've been able to see your yearning for wildness in your eyes. That trip helped some. We'll find other sanctuaries. I fall more and more in love with you, each passing moment.